This is a post with no helpful travel hints on keeping your
child occupied. We were quite lucky as my child kept herself rather well occupied;
she did this by asking for us to stop for a wee every 18.7 minutes and
alternating with the questions, “Where is the sea? When will be at the sea? Can
I have a wee in the sea? Why can’t I poo in the sea, I want to poo in the sea?
Does the sea have eyes? I want the sea? When can I see the sea? Can the sea
see? When will be at the sea?” At this stage we had only left our driveway.
I envisioned the perfect holiday and it started out that
way; perfectly chaotic that is, with a meltdown or two thrown in for good
measure.
Meltdown one: Me to Ms K. “Morning, we are going to the sea my
baby. You have a choice of these two outfits.” What ensued was a 40 minute
screaming, crying and feeling sorry for oneself and that was just me! This is
an ongoing problem in our household, getting Kenzie to wear the required outfit
for the ensuing activity. Somehow, through the snot and tears, she ended up
wearing a blue tutu with a spotted top and those plastic girly high heels, also
known as, “eina” heels. Smugly, thinking we had won, we put her in the car, ready
to go to the sea. Come to think of it, Miss K won, she wore neither the dress nor
the t-shirt and shorts combo that I put out. They were cute outfits, I promise.
Meltdown two: Ms T didn’t want the cereal I made for her breakfast,
nor did she want to sit, stand, crawl or smile. Ok, let me rephrase that, I can
be so negative sometimes; she did want to cry and moan.
Meltdown three: A mom, wondering where her perfect holiday
vision had gone, as she sits in a cesspit of broken dreams and tears that have
washed away her dreams, as she starts drowning in the constant stream of pity
and worthlessness. First world problems can bite me.
At this stage we are
already an hour behind schedule, and it is a bit more delayed as we have to
stop for our obligatory personality, Coffee!
No comments:
Post a Comment